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A Cupboard's Tale

from Threelayer by Soy

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lyrics

This kitchen's poorly organized!
And these cupboards and drawers must've been built by chimps!
Now I barely passed Woodwork 8,
but I'll be fucked if I gotta spend my whole 6-month lease cooking in this shithole.

Prime timbers
like teak and oak
and rosewood
are way outside
of your budget.
Your kitchen's useless
if you're fucking broke.

So I'll build it with manmade crap
like plywood and particle board.
And I'll have to invest in some power tools.
You can't cut chipboard with a handsaw.

Dude, I've cut beech with a handsaw.
Hard work, but it cut straight and clean.
Try that with this waferboard trash.
Now try it with a bandsaw and see what I mean.

Hand me that jigsaw and spindle moulder.
Don't nail plywood; it'll just split.
Cut a tambour groove right into the carcase.
Use dowelled mitres; no veneer-keyed shit.

Right here I should make
slot-dovetail joints.
Gotta buy a toothing plane
and a keyhole saw.
Better make these tongues
double-chamfered.
These lippings and edgings will
surely drop my landlord's
jaw.

Now this is an efficient kitchen.
Really feels like an accomplishment.
I used local value-added products
that won't ever get warped or bent.

This has been a cupboard's tale.

credits

from Threelayer, released March 11, 2012

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about

Soy Victoria, British Columbia

Soy formed in 1996, put out a cassette and a 7-inch, toured a bit, broke up in '97, reunited in '11, and played a few shows and recorded some new stuff in '12. Scheduled to break up again in '14, so enjoy it while you can. RIP Richard Dunn.

Drums/Vocals: Doug
Guitar: Paul
Bass/Vocals: Cruiser
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